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[personal profile] shanachie_quill
Title: A Colorful Day at Avengers’ Tower
Characters: Darcy Lewis, James “Bucky” Barnes, Jane Foster, Clint Barton, Bruce Banner, Natasha Romanov, Steve Rogers, JARVIS
Fandom: Avengers (2012), Thor
Series:
Written For: angelskuuipo (one day I’ll learn to spell your name and not have to look it up) HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Prompt: unexpected laughter
Summary: Darcy is used to the crazy around the tower, but not so much the big, bad former assassin taking the crazy in stride.
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: Nothing really major
Warnings: As Cap says "Language!" people being crazy
Disclaimer: No one recognizable belongs to me. Not making any money off this.
Second Disclaimer: Despite being fanfiction, this is MY work and I do not give anyone or any other site permission to republish this story under my name or any other without my authorization.
Author's Note: This was a LOT of fun to write once I figured out WHAT I was writing. I pretty much tossed canon out. (But not cannon since I’m not entirely sure WHAT caused the issue.) And special thanks to irishjeeper and dragonydreams for their assistance with beta’ing and titling. Happy birthday again, Angelskuuipo!


Darcy had to admit that if anyone had told her when she was eighteen that she’d be living in Stark Tower and riding herd over a bunch of superheroes; she would have laughed in their face. Of course if they had told her she’d be best friends with a woman in love with an honest to Valhalla Norse god, she’d probably have tried to have them committed to the crazy farm.

Instead there were days she thought she should be committed to the crazy farm. Apparently there wasn’t as much call for a super-powered, super team as they’d thought when the Avengers was formed and that meant the group had a lot of downtime on their hands. And Darcy was tasked with keeping them under control.

So she really wasn’t all that surprised to hear the explosion coming from the direction of the labs before she’d even had her first cup of coffee one morning. Dropping the cup she’d picked up (and ignoring it as it shattered in the sink), she raced for the elevator. “JARVIS! Status report!”

“The explosion was in the secondary lab,” the AI reported promptly. “Non-essential personnel are being evacuated.”

“Who’s in the lab?” Darcy demanded as she skidded into the open car. She just barely stopped before slamming into the back wall.

“Doctors Foster and Banner are in the lab,” JARVIS replied. “Along with Agents Barton, Romanov, and Captain Rogers.”

Darcy looked up, not having broken herself of looking towards the speakers when addressing the AI. “Are we looking at a Code Green?”

“Doctor Banner appears to be in control of his alter-ego at the moment.”

The ex-intern exited the elevator cautiously since she didn’t know what had caused the explosion. It still wasn’t slowly enough to prevent her almost running into James Barnes. The former assassin grabbed her arms before she could barrel into him. “Not sure you want to go down there, Doll,” he commented.

She shook off his grip, tilting her head to look up at him. “Pretty sure it’s part of my job. Now either get out of my way or come and help me.”

“Don’t say I didn’t warn you,” Barnes replied, stepping out of her path and then falling in behind her as she moved purposefully down the hall.

“About the only thing that could terrorize me now is if Tony finally invented a matter disrupter and everybody’s clothes were gone.” Darcy rolled her eyes as she reached for the palm reader. “I see enough naked Jane without having to see naked everyone!” She pressed her hand against the palm reader, frowning when the reader beeped a negative and the light flashed red. “JARVIS?”

“I apologize, Miss Lewis, but Sir has apparently circumvented my ability to access the locks,” JARVIS replied.

“Remind me to tell Tony he’s an asshole,” Darcy commented. “Is there any reason we should be locked out? Anything in there going to make our faces melt off or anything?”

“Not according to the readings I can still access,” JARVIS answered.

Darcy frowned at that information. “Does that mean there are readings you can’t access?” she asked hesitantly.

“As far as I’m able to determine, my readings are complete, but Sir might have taken something offline.”

“Without you being aware of it? I doubt that, JARVIS.” Darcy set her hand on the palm reader again. “Let’s try this. Override. Lewis 763 Charlie Alpha Zeta.”

For a minute Barnes didn’t think it was going to work, then the lock released with a snick, and the door slowly slid open. He grabbed her arm as Darcy started forward. “Let me go first.”

She actually considered arguing, but then thought better of it. He was definitely more suited to go into an unknown situation than she was. Stepping back, she motioned for him to go first.

Barnes glanced at her before stepping forward and in front of her. His hand went to the pistol in the holster on his thigh, but he didn’t draw it. As he stepped through the doorway, Darcy could hear groans coming from inside the lab, but she waited for an all-clear.

Instead of Barnes’s voice calling an all-clear, she heard something else... It was rusty sounding at first, but then it cleared and firmed up as if the longer it went on, the easier it became. And the more recognizable it became too.

“Are you LAUGHING?!” Darcy demanded.

The noise was choked off long enough for Barnes to call, “It’s safe.” Then it started again.

When Darcy entered the lab, she expected the find mayhem and chaos. She was even prepared for blood and body parts. She was not prepared for the Winter Soldier to be leaning against a table as he laughed.

“Do I want to know?” Darcy asked.

In answer, Barnes waved a hand at the other side of the room where the room’s occupants were arrayed. Darcy glanced at them, then looked again. Barton’s short blondish locks had been replaced with a deep purple color. Natasha’s normally red hair was an electric blue, although the curls fell in their normal soft waves. Jane’s dark hair was now a carrot orange color while Bruce’s was a surprisingly bright teal. It was clearly Rogers’s hair that had caused Barnes’s unexpected laughter though. The formerly blonde Captain now sported rainbow colored locks as if he was ready for a Pride parade.

Darcy’s hands went to her hips as she attempted to glare at the group. “Whose… whose fault…” she started before losing the battle and giving into her own giggles. Rogers’s disgruntled face only made her laugh harder.

Clint ran a hand through his hair, checking the appendage afterwards to make sure none of the color had rubbed off. “Well, I always wanted purple hair,” he commented.

“Do the words ‘undercover’ mean nothing to you?” Natasha responded as she examined her own blue locks.

“Aw, ease up, Nat, it’s nothing a bottle of dye won’t fix,” Clint responded, throwing an arm around her shoulder. He jumped back a moment later as if he’d been bitten and Darcy saw a glint in the space between them. She decided it was in her best interest to ignore the interaction.

“Is anyone actually hurt?” Darcy asked. “Bruce? Jane?”

“We’re fine. I don’t think the explosion caused any actual damage,” Jane answered.

“Okay.” Darcy clapped her hands lightly. “Then how about the rest of the non-essential personnel clear out and let the sciency people figure out what made everything go boom?” She looked around. “And where’s Tony?”

“Sir was not in the lab when the explosion occurred,” JARVIS spoke up.

“Well, that’s one less thing to worry about.” Darcy made shooing motions. “Out. Everybody out.”

As she herded them out of the lab, she could hear Jane and Banner begin to discuss the issue. Hopefully they’d figure it out and be able to get everyone’s hair color back to normal, but honestly this was a minor blip when it came to explosions and chaos in the day to day life of Avengers’ Tower.